I AM Present

I AM Present

Sunday, March 27, 2016

RELEASING FEAR, LETTING GO

26 March 2016





SA citizens are getting their collective knickers/boxers in a knot over who really runs the country. As if we didn’t know already. Well, at least those of us that were prepared to keep our minds open, connect the dots, do the research and discern.
When I look around and hear and see shock, horror and outrage over current perceptions about one powerful, Indian family in South Africa, I feel gratitude.

Why? Because when our misperceptions of ourselves and others and our world come to a head and ‘expose’ themselves more truthfully to us, we are forced to look at and question this, in order to let go of falsehoods. That either we have told ourselves or the world has told us.

Here's some context.
The Guptas arrived on SA’s doorstep nearly 20 years ago with a bang. Purportedly ‘friends’ of the president, Jacob Zuma, the first major brouhaha was over them chartering a SA government plane for their Indian guests for a family wedding. How dare they, the country’s political VIP’s and media screamed, demanding answers.

Then suddenly the Guptas were setting up a weekly newspapers called The New Age – laughed off in media and civil circles as being another propagandist tool for the so-called ruling party. But then aren’t they all.
They have purportedly been over-inflating readership numbers, probably since its inception. And likely for the same reason other publications being caught out doing the same have - to give the perception of importance amongst publications for purposes of pulling in advertising revenue. They have a business magazine, too.

Over the past weeks their name is all over everywhere again – this time for allegedly offering ministers other ministerial positions. Known as deal-brokers who push for and get government contracts and tenders, including Transnet (SA’s primary transportation company)and pressurizing Eskom into deals, their activities and tentacles extend across many industries. They have built their empire in technology, mining and transportation and have stakes in Comair, a national airline carrier, amongst many others.
What’s currently being asked is how can a materially-powerful family have manipulated JZ into handing over so much to them. To top it, they’re not even South African.

For the same amount of time the MSM have kept trying to connect the dots about this family.
Yet, all of the analyses would be quickly and easily solved if it was a known and accepted fact that the Guptas run South Africa. They call the shots and not the president or cabinet.

How and why else would they be able to summon cabinet ministers to their home on a regular basis, if they were just any ordinary emigrated family made good?
All would be much easier and more logical in our understanding if we knew the Guptas were nothing less than the Khazarian Zhionist Talmudics go-to family in South Africa. Then all that seemingly-disparate power wielding would make perfect sense. They have been given this land to rule. For now, anyway.

Rather than them being ‘friends’ of our President as he claims and is echoed in the KZT-owned MSM, he’s their puppet. What they say, goes and (clone) Zuma does their bidding, like many other puppet ‘leaders’ around the globe.
In much same way the Guptas are the equal puppets in turn of their slave-masters, the KZT’s.

If we were all coming from that premise in perception, all other questions causing this endless tizz of shock-horror here right now, would disappear in a heartbeat.

All we really have to do is ask the right questions in the first place. And therein lies the rub as that also means facing and exploring the subject/person in totality. To let go of our past misperceptions causing present pain, we cannot afford not to do this.

Whether it’s discovering world scandals and controversy is so vastly different to the myriad brainwashing we’ve accepted over the years as reality, or our very own internal discoveries about ourselves - the process is similar.

Identifying and letting go is also about recognizing what we have invested in, in holding onto such ideas. Ultimately, we’ll come to the same conclusion: ego-identified fears about our world or our innermost core selves have provided a sense of security. Albeit a false one.

When we do wake to parts of our Matrix world or ourselves, discover the falsehood and desire to move on, it’s far easier to do in matters relating to our external world.
Doing same with long-held, limiting inner patterns that hinder the true beautiful Self in God that we all are takes a lot more desire and effort. In order to arrive at the letting go part, I also believe the gift of Grace is much involved here.

We can choose to let go quickly or resist due to those selfsame fears and ego-identifying sense of fake security.

Of course, choosing the latter means the entire process becomes more painful, the longer we take. On this I could write a thesis.
I should add here that many of us seem to do our 'best' letting go when the burden of carrying something has become unbearable.


Rather than risking feeling vulnerable, letting go and trusting God within and without, we’d rather hang on to that which clearly doesn’t work. This is due, I feel, to not being able or willing to come into enough trust. Of ourselves and God.

I can demonstrate the ‘hanging on’ part very literally in an experience I had recently and as a multi-layered metaphor for my own life; maybe for many of our lives.

I recently went to do a story which involved experiencing an aerial obstacle course, originally designed for kids. The venue consisted of ropes, nets, tunnels, ziplines and more – all set up in a forested area and supported by the trees.
Loads of adults join in after watching their kids having such a great time. I don’t do heights of this kind easily, yet I’m fine flying a plane or enjoying a view from a mountain top.
On the ‘toughest’ of the four obstacle courses, I was at most less than 5 metres from terra firma. But looking down at the ground was still a hideous experience for me.
Fear swept through me in nauseous waves every time I did. My stomach went one way and my heart seemed to go another. It was truly petrifying.

When I reached the shorter than 50 metre zipline, I stood there for what seemed like eternity. My guide at the other end tried to motivate me to take the plunge. I kept delaying, making sure repeatedly that both my clips were securely hooked on to the pulley. Which in turn was hooked up on to the zipline.
I couldn’t move; I felt frozen. One doom scenario after another flashed through my mind. I thought about turning around and climbing down at the closest exit point...but didn’t.
It took me forever through all that fear to allow my real Self’s feelings and thoughts to reach me: ‘All you have to do is trust. Trust you are protected and you are not going to fall to the ground...’

When I finally did let go it was both the most frightening experience and liberating one simultaneously. Yes, my eyes were squeezed tightly shut and I can’t say I took any pleasure out of it that first time, but I did do it!

By about Round Five, I was able to zipline with my eyes open and with sounds of pleasure coming from me, rather than terror.
As I made my way down to the ground at the end of the challenges, I remembered I’d been so locked into my height fears as we did the many other challenges too, I hadn’t been able to do it fully present in full conscious awareness. I’d done it to DO it, to get myself through the various courses so I could experience and write about it all.

How do I feel about heights and literally letting go now from such a dizzy height? Much better. But until I go there again and try some more leaps into the unknown, in honesty I don’t really know, so can’t say.
I am certain, though, it will be with far greater trust within.

Whether our letting go to free ourselves involves examining something for our attention in the political, environmental, social or personal arena, the same is demanded of us. To trust enough in the safety net of God's will in order to do that letting go of whatever each of us have to.


Holding on to fearful feelings and ideas created by external sources or ourselves is nothing more or less than holding on to those false senses of security created by our egos. It is the ego’s job to do just that.
But we are not that- we are gloriously free Goddesses and Gods. And our only mistake producing all of our disharmony within, is in erroneously identifying with our egos instead of our true identity: our God-conscious Selves.

Whether we’re reacting to a political scandal or a very personal issue within, the same is required of us to leave the past behind. But I should add here that many of us seem to do our 'best' letting go when the burden of carrying it becomes unbearable.


Everything starts and ends with ourselves. And that matter of movement, of change, demands just the slightest alteration of our perception to start with. Of ourselves and our world.